Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Dirty and awkward....but not.

I'm really getting settled into my new job. I'm really building relationships with some of the residents and I enjoy spending time with many of them. I listen about their children, grand children, spouses that have passed, regrets, memories, and even discuss their meals with them. Nearly all of them are very happy to see me and some even greet me with a kiss on the hand. We've been sharing some quality time together.

There is this one man, for HIPPA and privacy reasons, I'll call him mister P. Mister P has been living in the retirement facility for a year or so. He hates it there. He blames his wife for the fact that he's there. He goes off all the time about how he's gonna divorce her as soon as he gets out of there. When I ask him why, he says, "because she put me in this fucking place!!" I think he forgets that she is really sick and can't take care of his post-stroke needs. Mister P is one of my favorite residents. He's one of the few smokers, but is limited to a certain amount of cigarettes per day. He is always calling to ask if he can have one yet, if it's "close enough" or if he can scoot the rules. He's retired military and loves to talk about my hubs, what he does, and how he's a "fly boy" cause he's in the Air Force. 

Yeah, something like that. ;)

Mister P. is a sweetie, but apparently, a pervert. Little did I know. Two nights ago, before I was leaving his room, I asked if there was anything else I could do before I left him for his night sleep. He said, "yeah bend over and let me spank your bottom." I started laughing, and told him that I don't think that's going to happen. Last night when I asked him the same question, he just made the spanking motion with is good hand. I started laughing again, shook my head, and tucked him in.

Ahhhh Mister P. frequently tells me that I'm pretty, but had never made a pervy move. I talked to some of the other girls and found out that he's actually grabbed their asses before. The funny part of it is, if it weren't totally against the rules and grounds for immediate termination, I just might have let him do it. He's all alone in a place he hates, he hates his wife.... it's like the least I could do, right? Plus, you know me.... I have a certain... soft spot for kinky folk. A man that has a penchant for spankings? I can't help but love him. :)

This was probably Mister P. and his wife
back in the day. Poor guy. 
From a girl who loves spankings, I found it all to be kind of funny. The more I think about it, the more weirded out I am that I'm NOT weirded out. I should feel kinda creeped out than an 80+ year old man made some moves? Right?

Yeah, I'm not, rock the fuck on Mister P.

...I just need to find a way to make sure his (appropriate) needs are met without asking him what else I can do for him!


  1. HA! Mister P was totes into some OTK action.

  2. Has Mr. P met Mrs. P? PMSL! OMG lady, I would be totally grossed out. BUT that's because I'm kinda of a prude. Not a prude in that spanking is bad...but just...oh I don't know how to put it. I'd say if you're comfortable letting him do it, GO FOR IT. But I couldn't let an 80 man near my ass to save my life.

    However, when I was 18 and used to take Jazzercise, there was this guy in his late 60's that always watched me during class. Oddly enough it didn't creep me out and I would purposely bend a certain way so he could see my cleavage during the floor exercise ;)

    Great post!

    xo J

  3. Y'know, I'm glad for Mr. P that it doesn't creep you out. Sounds like he needs a friend. His generation is so different from ours in their beliefs and attitudes towards woman, so I can understand giving him a bit of leeway. Though I hope that he doesn't just up and grab your ass! But I do totally get your feeling empathetic towards him and his situation. I think it's great that he's got you to talk to.

    Me, I have a soft spot for grandpa's, so based on that it would creep me out a bit.

  4. I read this post earlier this morning and had a deep and meaningful comment to make. But I was using my iPod and I hate typing on that, so I parked the thought.

    And now it's gone :-(

    Anyhoo, having re-read the post, I think that maybe you're not creeped out because we tend to think of senior folk as being pretty much asexual IYKWIM - even though his 'requests' are anything but :-o

    I worked with elderly people for a long time, and I remember getting a few lewd comments (in my younger years!), but they were kind of like water off a duck's back - simply because I never took them seriously. Maybe that's what's happening with you?

    Either way, I agree with @Smitten - it's cool that he's got a friend in you - and most importantly someone who is gonna give as good as she gets (in a manner of speaking, of course!).

    Glad you're enjoying the job!

    CC x

  5. He is lucky that he has an understanding nurse and that probably makes him very happy. Just don't let him actually spank you... at least not by your choice :) and if he does spank you by his choice... try not to enjoy it ;) LOL!!!