Thursday, December 29, 2011
Saturday, October 22, 2011
This song reminds me of such great times with my h00rs.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Ok, so I'm just sooooooooooo excited I couldn't not do a teeny tiny post about heading to Forks. Again! I have mentally checked out, packed my bags and headed for the airport. Unfortunately, my physical self must go to work tomorrow before it can catch up with my mentality. I have a feeling it's gonna be a loooonnnggggg two days. So instead of despising every minute until I leave on Wednesday morning, I plan on looking forward to hanging with my favorite tweeps, visiting Escala (which I found out today is less than 3 blocks from our hotel in Seattle SQUEEEEEE!!!!), hiking the Hoh with AllTwiedUp, tackle hugging those of you I did & didn't meet last year & drinking until my liver stages a formal protest.
See you soon Forks!!!
Let the count down continue.....
Only 2600 more minutes til my flight!!!!!
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
...Old School? Anybody? Okay, anyways, my mind is so fucking preoccupied with FOOORKS.
|Ahh the crazy times.....|
|The libations and delicious local beer...|
|Our karaoke fiends!!|
|Maybe some quasi-attractive locals?|
(quasi meaning tall, fit AND can sing...)
|With very peculiar tattoos?|
|Hunting (with my .22) for Jacob on First Beach!|
|Taking a million more pics like this!|
|Going to one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen!|
|...and taking more pictures....|
|and even more pictures!|
|and even MORE!|
|And hiking to waterfalls....|
|Birds of a feather|
|partying Twitarded style|
|the goofy-ass things we will do|
|adorable friends that don't get the RPatz thing,|
but I still love...
|the great conversation|
|And the lovely women who gave me all of the afore-mentioned.|
|I heart you so and I can't wait to see you all!|
Monday, August 29, 2011
Friday, August 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Long story short… I got the flu really bad, like can’t sit up or move bad, about a year and a half ago and my mom was kind enough to buy me a book. That book was New Moon (if you don’t know what I’m talking about, just stop reading now and go away. Kthxbai.) and I was hooked. A few short months and several readings of the Twilight books later I stumbled across an MTV article about odd Twilight related merchandise that led me to Twitarded. After reading the Pattinson Panties post and nearly pissing myself from laughing harder than I had in literally years I became a devoted stalker, I mean blog follower. Over the next few months I discovered fanfiction, nurtured my ridiculous obsession with all things RPattz and I made the pilgrimage to Forks to meet the holy twifecta and the rest of the Twitarded h00rs I had come to know and love. And that is where I first met All Twied Up. We kareokeed…it was awesome. Since Forks, All Twied Up has become my bestest bestie and I have a feeling if we didn’t live two hours apart, we would be pretty much inseparable. I even told Mr. All Twied Up that All Twied Up was mine now and he can’t have her back, and yes, copious amounts of wine contributed to that statement, but it didn’t make it any less true.
I know you’re all wondering, “What does that have to do with why I am invading her blog today?” Well, it’s because over the last several months, along with her constant badgering about how much I “need” to join facebook (which I am still NOT doing, btw), All Twied Up has been pushing me to start a blog. And since she is an unyielding, pushy, dominatrix-type force, and I fluv her more than almost anyone she finally wore me down…sortof. Instead of starting my own blog, because I have no idea what I would fill it with or why anyone would read it, I told her I was going to hijack hers. This was followed by a desperate tweet to her that said I can’t hijack her blog because I am, in fact, not a hacker. Anyway, that is the short version of why I'm here today.
I really have no fucking clue why All Twied Up thinks I should write a blog, much less contribute to hers because I am not “dirty” or “hot” by any stretch of the imagination. All Twied Up refers to me as her ‘vanilla’ friend. That is a drastic overstatement… vanilla has way too much spice to be in anyway related to my sex life.
|This glass of tepid water is a better representation of my sex life. Except that the water actually exists...my sex life, not so much.|
Intelligence…check. Socially Inept…check. Obsession…triple check.
Crikey…I love these sharks! Isn't he cute! Did you know they are actually warm blooded and give birth to live young?!?! So cool!
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Secondly, sorry it took me so long to get this out. Hope you learn a little something...
Now here's the thing, I am actually worried that I will not have 25 things to share cause I feel like I so frequently have diarrhea of the mouth. I mean really, I've shared some of the most intimate parts of myself in not-so eloquent ways...if you know what I mean. And my past has not been all rainbows and butterflies. But alas, here goes my thesis:
1. I am not a dancer. I mean I CANNOT dance. However, get enough alcohol in me and good luck pulling me off that floor. It's really quite amazing how the ratio of alcohol to the ratio of dancing is spot on.
Okay, here's the worst part of #1. Sometimes I get a little too much gusto in me and actually attempt lap dances. Naturally, because I'm not that smooth, something usually goes wrong. Like this last time at my sisters birthday party (parents and parent's friends abound), my "super sexy hair whip" blinded my husband and ruined the whole thing. Check out this priceless photo:
|laughing at my epic fail|
3. My current marriage is not my first. I did the whole "run away to Hawaii at 19 and marry an Army boy who I knew for four months who deployed for a year two months later".... then get divorced 2 years later thing. It was one of the most difficult times of my life, but I'm one of those "everything shitty that happens is a lesson" type of people. I would NEVER be where I am now without that experience.
4. I, too, had a horse when I was younger. She was named Little Bit because she was so small. She had a small bit, you know, the part of the reigns that fits in the mouth? She was inches away from being considered a pony. We had to get rid of her because of number five.
|awww, reminds me of Little Bit|
|Not me. Or anybody I know. But hookah and|
10. I've told nearly all of you that I'm a lacto-vegetarian (bordering on vegan) but what you don't know, is that we have the WORST farts ever. Oh my gawd, I'm talking raunchy. Broccoli, one of my favorite veggies, hates my bowels. Pray they don't have broccoli in forks, @norcaltwitard, @amandakmelby, @jaymes805...cause you'll be hating life in that room!
11. I met my husband on Myspace. LMAO! I'm not even kidding. He sent me a message saying "Hi. :)" I looked at his profile pic and saw this:
|This was the kicker|
12. I was born and raised in the Bay Area, now moving back after being in Hawaii for so long, people ask me where I'm from. Psssshaw! I'm a NorCal girl at heart. :) It's okay, I love my SoCal girls. Because they are so unlike the stereotypical SoCal girls. :)
|lol love it!|
13. My mom is one of my best friends, but if she ever saw this blog she'd freak. I share about 95% of myself with my mother, which is actually a hell of a lot. She even went to FOOOOORKS with me last year and we had a freakin awesome time! I love my mommy so much.
14. There are three things that genetics has the potential of fucking me over with. Panic Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder and Colon Cancer. On both my maternal and paternal side. I have two thus far. When I turn thirty I'll be getting the ol scope up the pooper (technical term) to make damn sure that I don't get all three.
15. I value most animal lives over human's lives. Sounds so sick considering my chosen profession and all, but I'll be damned, it's the truth. I don't think that 75% of people deserve the air they breathe. But I'll do my best to assure they still get it. Who am I to judge? I try to stay as nonjudgmental as I can because I can't stand people who judge others, I just tend to dislike ignorant people.
Biocentrism (Greek: βίος, bio, "life"; and κέντρον, kentron, "center"), in a political and ecological sense, is an ethical point of view which extends inherent value to non-human species,ecosystems, and processes in nature - regardless of their sentience. It stands in contrast to anthropocentrism which centers on the value of humans
That's me. AKA Hippie? lol Courtesy of good ol Wikipedia.
16. You probably wouldn't guess, but I'm a bit of a Metal Head. Check out my most recent post here. Most of my iPhone contains music that would make most people around the world cringe. The harder the better. I can't stand what society calls "alternative" now days. I'd love it if Hinder, Nickelback and Post-"My Own Prison" Creed would go on a world tour, share a plane, and shared a fiery death just so I would never have to hear one of their songs ever again. No offense, ladies, if you care. :)
17. Now here comes a big secret. I'm a HUGE Britney Spears fan. Fucking love her new stuff. I mean Crazy era and after that. The stuff that's more club/techno than pop. "Gimme More" and "3" are my freakin jams. I have the "Best of" and I quite frequently bump the shit out of it. I mean that literally. I have two 10'' subs in my trunk. ;) My car used to be the hubs car. He had it pretty tricked out. When he got his dream truck, I negotiated the system. Schweeeeet!
18. I've recently lost 20 lbs. Yeah, it's work's fault. I had to buy all new pants/shorts/skirts. I'm a huge cheap ass, so this was seriously a big deal. I still wear clothes from middle school. Hey, dont' judge. The old shirts are always the most comfortable! :)
19. I get severe road rage. Specifically towards those that don't use their blinkers. I literally have been known to yell, "USE YOUR FUCKING BLINKER YOU GODDAMN DUMBASS!" I am a horn honker and a finger flipper. And a mean-mugger. It's horribly embarrassing and it's in a very tourette-like manner. It makes my blood boil and I hate it! I wish I had more self control.
20. My husband officially fucking broke our bed... fucking. He literally pulled one of these:
Except with the footboard. He tore it apart!!!
|That is a Vietnam-era ammunition can holding|
our bed up. You can see where the hubs
tried to fix it with screws. FML.
22. I recently decided I wanted a snake. I went to the pet store to investigate the possibilities of raising a vegetarian snake and the woman looked at me like I wanted to skin it alive and ritualistically burn it. "Why on EARTH would you want to change it's nature?! NO, don't get a snake."..... I mean I totally see her point, but day-am! I just can't see something eaten alive. Even the pinkies that are frozen are just too much for me!
23. When I'm bored and sad, I go to the pet stores and pet puppies and look at kitties and other little animals. If it were up to me I'd have a million acres and I'd save all the homeless and helpless little animals. I will be "that" cat lady when I am older. The hubs even expects it. :) He says he'll prevent it, but I'd like to see him try. Muahahaha!
24. I've been dabbling with the idea of having a guest blogger here, you know who you are, bb, I just have to figure out how the hell to do it!
25. I've spilled enough guts. I hope you are all sated.
Love you all!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
|A prize for the person who knows who this is... okay,|
not really, but seriously.... know who it is?*
I've been wanting to get my husband's name on my ring finger for a really long time. Not on top like Pam Anderson's Tommy tattoo or anything like this,
But something that will be there forever, letting him know that I'm forever his... in more ways than one. Originally I wanted to add an apostrophe "S" but decided my mother would disown me. So instead I went for this:
I've wanted a white ink tattoo for the longest time, and I've wanted it to say "Family" and be in this particular location for a very, very long time. I just finally had the balls.
Holy shit, what a night! :)